Unfair
by crackerjack007
Summary: I'm Kikyo and this is my story, I will never live the life of a real woman.


**UNFAIR**

It was dark out, and the stars were shining like thousands of diamonds glimmering in the sunlight. The wind softly blew the woman's inky black hair from her pale face. Revealing eyes that always looked icy and void of any kind of emotion. A little lower down her face where full red lips once resided was now replaced by thin light pink lines. The woman resituated herself on the tree branch that she had slept in the night before, and would do so again tonight. As she rose her eyes to the night sky, she noticed the brightly glowing snakes flying straight towards her, she didn't flinch nor did she get scared, these were her soul stealers the souls that they brought her were the only things keeping her alive.

The woman jumped off the tree and gracefully landed on her feet, she had decided to take a walk. The soft patting of her footsteps on the slightly wet ground calmed her she didn't know why, maybe because when you could hear the soft 'pat' it meant that the world was quiet, when usually you hear birds chirping, squirrels scattering in the trees, demons either howling in victory or defeat, the armies of men going to war to fight over something probably pretty stupid. She didn't know where she was going, and she didn't really want to, but the place her legs took her surprised her enough for her eyes to widen even if it was just a little.

'_This is where that evil witch, Urasue had recreated me, she is the reason I'm walking dirt. Instead of resting peacefully at my grave.'_

The land looked untouched since the last time she had been here; there were still some arrows right beside the exact place she had stood when she tried to kill him. Without thinking she turned and walked the same path she had used to escape, when her reincarnation had tried to take all of her soul back. So of course she ended up at the cliff she had fallen off of. The woman walked over to the edge kneeled down and touched the dirt that he laid on when he had tried to save her from death.

'_KIKYO!!'_

Kikyo quickly took her hand from the ground almost as if had burned her, and stood back up to look at the world below her. Right at that moment she saw how much life could be unfair.

'_It's funny how all I've ever wanted even when I was a little girl was the regular life of a woman, and when I finally got that opportunity it blew up in my face, because I died.'_

Kikyo looked away from the scenery, recalling a past event.

"Mommy I'm tired of this I don't want to do it anymore." A seven-year-old Kikyo whined sticking out her bottom lip for emphasis.

The woman known as 'mommy' put her hand up to her mouth and giggled at the child's antics. The older woman looked around to see what damage the little girl had done. Almost every tree now had burn marks and arrows sticking out of the trunk except for the one that had the target. Which made the woman giggle some more.

"What's so funny mommy?"

"Nothing, we'll stop for today. Now how about we go back to the hut, and cook something to help the injured travelers?"

"Ok"

Once the pair had finally made it to the hut, they quickly got ready to make the medicine.

"Mommy?"

"Yes" replied the lady who was cutting up some kind of herbs and passing them to Kikyo to put into the mixture.

Kikyo put her hands on her lap once all the herbs were in the bowl, and looked down at the floor.

"Do you think that since I have to become a powerful priestess, and protect the Shikon Jewel that I wont be able to live like a real woman?"

"Kikyo, you will be able to live like a woman, you will just have different responsibilities."

"Oh" The small child looked down at her lap and a small smile tugged at her lips, she will get to be a woman with a regular life. She looked up at her mom and said

"I love you, mommy" for the last time of her life.

The wind rushed through Kikyo's hair taking her out of her thoughts.

'_Mom…she used to tell me stories of princes and princesses falling in love, and living long lives together…she used to say I would be one of them…but I've only felt like a princess one time in my life'_

Something was tickling the young woman's hand she looked down to see a leaf being blown by the wind but stuck behind her fingers, she spread her finger just enough for the leaf pass by, that's when she saw a scar that reminded her of another memory.

"Ahhh" a fifteen-year-old Kikyo hissed in pain once again she was trying to be able to take control of her miko powers, but she always ended up with burned hands.

"Why do you always do this if it's going hurt you?"

Surprised the priestess quickly turned around, he had snuck up on her again.

"Inuyasha!" she lightly slapped his chest to get her point across that she did not like the fact of him sneaking up on her, but her plan backfired once her hand made contact to his hard chest she hissed in pain again due to her burned hand. The hanyou had worry in his eyes up until the point where Kikyo's miko power decided to shock him and send him flying across the field.

"Inuyasha!" Kikyo yelled while running up to him once she got to his side, he sat up and yelled

"What the hell was that for!"

"Oh I'm so sorry I didn't mean to do it I swear" Kikyo looked away from his eyes afraid of what she might see.

"Why do you have to train so hard, your hurting yourself?"

"I have to do it for mother, I have to protect Kaede."

That was the only thing she could say until she started to sob uncontrollably, Inuyasha knew her mother had died when she was a little girl, so when he saw this he pulled her into a tight hug whispering comforting things in her ear, Inuyasha then took her chin into his hand and made her look up at him.

"I'm here, your not alone anymore, I promise I'll protect you." Kikyo didn't have a chance to reply because right as she opened her mouth he passionately but lightly kissed her.

Being pulled out of her thoughts again, Kikyo put her fingertips on her lips, _'That was my first kiss' _she remembered exactly what that kiss felt like, they had only kissed two times after that day, once being when she tried to drag him to hell with her.

'_Kagome my reincarnation had ruined it, she made Inuyasha snap out of unconsciousness, and once he saw her he ran from my arms straight to hers.'_

She still loves Inuyasha even though she knows he no longer loves her back.

'_Inuyasha cares about me, but loves Kagome. Is it so wrong to want to see someone that you love? Every time Kagome catches Inuyasha and me together she cries so maybe it is wrong, he always leaves me standing there alone while he goes and comforts someone the same way he used to comfort me'_

Kikyo started to walk back to her tree; her soul stealers found her and dropped white souls into her body.

'_This is wrong to steal the souls of dead women for my own just to keep me alive, but once Naraku is killed I will die completely and give them their souls back, hopefully they will forgive me'_

The woman climbed back up into the tree, and looked back up at the stars.

'_I'm Kikyo and this is my story, my mother died when I was seven. I grew up and fell in love with a man named Inuyasha, but he betrayed me, by killing me, so I died when I was eight-teen, but right before I did I sealed him to the Sacred tree. Fifty years later I was brought back to life and found out that Naraku had deceived Inuyasha, and me. Now I have to live with the fact that I had tried to kill Inuyasha by sealing him to the tree when he did nothing accept love and protect me. I also acknowledged that the person I love does not love me but someone that looks exactly like me. I must steal souls in order to stay alive, but worst of all I have to wonder this world alone knowing I will never live the life of a real woman'_

Staring at the stars made Kikyo recall a conversation she once had with her mother.

"Kikyo"

Kikyos eyes looked over at her dieing mother she was sick and could not get better.

"Yes mommy"

"If I die…I'm going to go to the…moon ok." Her mother said it was hard for her to breath even harder to talk.

"Mommy you cant die I'm only seven I need you!"

"I wont leave…you I'll be at the…moon…which is always…with you even at day…sometimes ok"

"Ok" Kikyo said while snuggling up to her mom to fall asleep.

Leaning her head back against the bark of the tree, the woman's eyes wondered from the stars to the moon, what she whispered before she fell into slumber was the first time those words have left her lips since she was seven-years-old.

"I love you, mommy"


End file.
